It’s Cuffing Season

Cuffing season is amongst us. “It refers to when people get into relationships during the colder months of the year, even though they ordinarily wouldn’t be interested in a commitment. Relationships formed during so-called “cuffing season” are usually short-term in nature and end once spring rolls around.” You think you have feelings for someone when really you’re just filling the void that is loneliness & vulnerability.

How to survive cuffing season:

First, you need to acknowledge that you do not need somebody. Be honest with yourself – do you want companionship on a temporary basis? Are you considerably devoted to becoming a life long partner? Cure the loneliness and vulnerability by spending time with friends and family instead. Cuddle up on the sofa and watch a film, go for walks together wrapped up in your favourite jacket and scarf. Sit outside and light a fire and bond with your loved ones. Avoid starting meaningless relationships and work on the ones you already have.

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You’re not looking but it finds you – Guard your heart. Don’t allow others to use your vulnerability during this time. I’ve had my fair share of meaningless relationships throughout the winter, due to the feeling of needing companionship. It was fun while it lasted but did it really benefit you if you’re on the receiving end of someone who’s not really interested in commitment? How do you know you aren’t subject to their romancing ways and now you find yourself trapped in their web whilst they’ve already pondered on.

Don’t accept sh*t you’re not really okay with – Communicate that you want intentions to be clear. Be upfront about your feelings and what you want out of a relationship at this time. If you want something casual, keep it that way. If you’re looking for long term commitment, now would be the time to emphasise on this so the other party is aware. Do not avoid that “What are we?” question or “What is your intentions?” – 9x out of 10 they’re “not ready for a relationship,” if this hasn’t already been made clear to you.

If you’re putting in 100% they need to do the same – If you find that you’re giving your all to this person and they’re take, take, taking – chances are to them it’s a ‘cuffing season’ relationship, you’re someone to pass time in the colder months. This entirely benefits them and not you. Conversations on their intentions need to be discussed to avoid the 90/10 effort rate.

They’re very likely to ghost you – You might find yourself thinking “Is it me?” if a genuine relationship was built in the first place, they’re very unlikely to ghost you. If you find yourself in a cuffing season situationship – be prepared for the ghosting. If you’re ghosted, don’t wake the dead.. Keep it moving. People who ghost you aren’t worth the time of day, considering they don’t think you’re worth the explanation as to why they no longer want to continue with you.

Either way, whatever this cuffing season brings you – self love is and will always be the most important thing.

Have you ever had a cuffing season situationship? Share your experience and what you learnt in the comments below.